Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The Proverbs 31 Wife - Week Four

Discussion question #4:
What is your definition of a homemaker? Growing up, what was your perception of a homemaker? What about now? Do you consider yourself a homemaker? Why or why not?

For most of my life, the definition of a homemaker was a woman who stayed home and didn't have a paying job.  She cooked, cleaned, took care of the kids and was room mother and general errand runner.  She was the one who watched your kids after school until you got home, etc.  My perception of a homemaker was colored by my mother's opinions.  It was someone who was "rich" enough to do that.  It wasn't necessarily a life choice, but a product of circumstances.  As a child of the 70's, I wasn't too far removed from "women did not work outside the home", yet in the middle of "we can if we want to".  My mother's opinion was that success was based on a career and money in the bank.  She was a hard worker and penny pincher and taught me a lot of great things, but it was the lady next door who taught me to tie my shoes and to chew with my mouth closed and let me put makeup on her and do her hair.

Growing up like that it was just understood that I would go to college, get a degree, and make enough money to take care of myself if I needed to, or have enough stashed away if I didn't.  I worked multiple jobs, a combo of full and part time.  Then God started to change my heart.  If I had enough time to tell you my whole story you would completely understand that it was most definitely God that changed it!

Long story short, I recently quit my job and now I am what I always considered to be a homemaker.  Mostly.  I don't have human children, and I don't watch any of the neighbor kids.  But I do all of the rest.  But you know what?  You don't have to be a stay at home....whatever to be a homemaker!  A homemaker is just what the word seems to be.  A person who makes the home.  You cook and clean maybe only on the weekends.  You make your family feel safe at home.  You create a cozy environment not just through decor but your personality.  You see I was actually a homemaker all along.  I just have more time now to do it at a slower pace.  But someone who has a paying job isn't any less of a homemaker....unless of course you are never there.  That's something to think about.  I was getting close to that and decided that wasn't what I wanted.  Trust me, making this decision wasn't easy.  The budget is so tight I could bounce a quarter off of it....if I had an extra quarter.  But for us right now, it's just right.

I'm not trying to tell you to be one thing or the other.  The only thing I am saying is to search your heart and ask God to reveal His will for your life.  He might tell you that "you are in a career that I need you to be in right now".  He might tell you "I need you to slow down to part time so that you have more time for ME".  And He might be telling you that He wants you to stay home for whatever reason.  Just don't let others try to define you.  If you have a home and take care of it and the people there in any way, you are a homemaker.  Are you the best one for your family right now?  Only God, you and your family can decide that.

Until Next Time.....

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