Wednesday, April 18, 2012

The Proverbs 31 Wife - Week Thirty

Question #30: Have you ever struggled with working in a job outside the home and taking care of your family?  Describe your situation.  Have you ever been misunderstood by the people you worked with, either in your job or as a wife and/or mom?

I kinda feel like I've already answered this question, or maybe I just feel like a broken record where this topic is concerned.  If you've followed me at all you know I struggled with working outside the a big way!  For the last two years that I worked I really wasn't taking care of my family.  My job was so exhausting to me, with my health, that when I got home I felt like I was crawling to my chair.  Then once I got my feet up, I was done for the night.  My husband brought me food and medicine and I sat there until it was bedtime and the whole cycle started all over.  That meant that I had to do all of my chores on Saturday and Sunday.  Saturday, while my husband went fishing, I did laundry and housekeeping.  Since there was a whole week saved up, by the time I was done, it was just like a work day.  By late afternoon I was back in my chair and my husband had to take over.  I tried to cook a meal before that would happen.  That's when the crock pot became my new best friend.  Sunday after church was looking through all of the ads and coupons in the paper and planning the shopping trip.  Once again, by the time I had been to church, done the shopping and maybe got another meal cooked I was done and back in the chair.  And the cycle began again the next morning.  Two years I did this!!

When I decided to quit and stay home, I could only name one or two people who DID understand.  Most people thought my husband must be rich if I could stay home when I didn't have children.  We are far from it, by America's standards anyway.  I have to penny pinch and do without of a lot of things.  We haven't had a vacation in about 3 years and that one was only 4 days and we drove and were very frugal with the whole thing.  Other people thought I was just plain lazy.  They said they were tired at the end of the day too, but they still got off their butt and worked.  Yeah, 'cause all I do all day long is sit on my butt!

The real question is, does it really matter if people misunderstand you?  Yes I know it's frustrating, and all I ever wanted to do was explain everything I did to everyone I knew because I wanted them to understand everything.  But it doesn't matter!  My family is more important, and without my health, what good am I to them?  But even more important is God.  If you check out the story above, where do you see my relationship with God?  Yeah, an hour and a half on Sunday morning.....and praying to get through another day.  That was about it.

For those two years, I was on a medicine for nerve pain that made me gain weight.  It also didn't help that I sat in a chair for 4-5 hours before going to bed and all I did in that chair was eat, read and watch TV.  

Now, I schedule my chores daily so they are spread out.  I also schedule in meals and exercise.  Most importantly, I schedule in Bible study!  There are even some days that I'll skip over a chore or two to spend more time in my Bible study.  I can hardly wait to get into it every day!  My husband has also benefitted a lot because he doesn't have to worry about taking care of me every evening.  There are some days here and there where I'm in that chair for a little while before bedtime, but I'm getting better at spreading things out so that doesn't happen.  This house is clean most every day instead of only once a week, and he comes home to a meal most days instead of coming home and trying to decide what to take out of the freezer.

This new life is still a work in progress, but let's be realistic, whose isn't??!!  Just remember to ask yourself what is most important; what people think, or what God thinks?  I think you know the answer.

Until Next Time.....

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